Getting men to dance

          Linda and I have gone to a number of dances and much of our time is spent " dancer watching ". It is interesting that some women get asked to dance a lot and others don't. It's not uncommon for women dancers to tell us that they don't like going to dances because they never get asked to dance. So we tried to figure out why some women get asked to dance and others don't.

          The answer was clear. When a song is about to begin get up on the edge of the dance floor and slowly walk along the edge. While you are walking, look at the men and smile. You will notice that several men will look and smile back but they may be too shy to ask you to dance. If you haven't been asked, go back and walk the walk on the edge of the floor again. This time, raise you hand toward anyone that smiled back at you earlier to invite him out and be sure to smile when you extend your hand. It works.

          We recently noticed a woman who got up from her table at the end of each dance and then offered her hand to men coming off of the dance floor. Bold? Yes, but it worked well. Some more bold women will get up onto the edge of the dance floor and walk about just before the previous dance is completed. As the dance couples come off the floor, the woman smiles ata targeted man and lifts her hand to him. Sometimes she will actually grab/take his hand. Men almost always will respond to an outstretched inviting hand from a woman.

          Be prepared to be occasionally refused. This is life. You are playing a numbers game: the more men you invite to dance, the greater your chances of dancing. Once you start dancing, the men you dance with become familiar with you and you will find that they will be more comfortable dancing with you later. You'll get asked more.

          Your seating position in the dance facility also matters. If you are stuck sitting to the extreme side of the dance floor, it is difficult for men to run the gauntlet to get to you. By the time the man gets to you, several other woman have probably smiled at him or even offered their hands.

          Take monthly dance lessons and ask the men who take lessons with you if they will dance with you at the dance parties. Dress nicely and spend the money for a nice dress. Take the pre-party dance lessons and don't come late after the lesson. The dance instructor usually has students switch partners and this allows you to meet potential dance partners for later in the dance. Most dances have one or two mixers during the dance. Absolutely, get up and in the women's waiting line on every mixer since doing this allows you to meet and dance with some men who may later be more comfortable asking you to dance since they have already met and danced with you.


          By the way, did I mention I was a dentist? If you need an Atlanta dancing dentist who loves creating beautiful smiles and making people happy, please visit my dental website at

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